Remix: Shape of My Heart (Geometry & Metaphor Remix) [Fraser/Kowalski, 250 words, rated G], by simplystars
My heart is an idiot
(my heart is a square, boxed up and closed off, unreaching and unreachable)
Sometimes Fraser feels so stupid. Awkward and fumbling, un-cool, un-hip; the very epitome of "square."
But then he realizes that with four straight sides he can box himself up, close himself off - cage up his treacherous heart and lock it away, like a dangerous wild animal. Can't be trusted.
My heart is a stray bullet
(my heart is a triangle. pointed and sharp)
Sometimes (too often) people get hurt. It doesn't make a difference if the injury was unintentional; Fraser feels as if he's all elbows, sharp-edged and pointed bone, driving out someone's breath with a blow to the gut or digging painfully into their ribs.
He doesn't mean for it to happen.
My heart is the worst kind of weapon
(prone to scratching deeply and leaving behind painful scars)
Sometimes, he can't look Ray (or Ray, or Dief, or Welsh) in the eye.
With Victoria, he was both betrayed and betrayer. Fraser supposes he's paid a forfeit; the scar low on his spine reminds him daily of his sin, and prompts him to penance.
It won't ever be enough.
My heart is that eternal rose tattoo
(sometimes, in the brief pauses of his life, Fraser ponders the shape of his heart)
Sometimes he can't understand Ray's infatuation.
He completely comprehends his own fascination with his quirky partner - Ray is charming, tactile, staunchly loyal, predictably impulsive. But what allure can Fraser possibly hold for Ray?
He tastes the black-and-red tracery of Ray's tattoo, salty and sweaty under his tongue. Doesn't ask.
My heart is a flower
(my heart is a circle)
Sometimes Fraser muses, a circle - sharp edges worn smooth with time. Or he pictures the sideways-eight of infinity; the entwined paths of their lives, an endless journey.
Over time, watching Ray patting the dogs, wrestling with them in the snow... Fraser's learned.
His heart is a flower.