Remix: Listen to Your Own Silence (The Devil in All of Us Remix) [John Winchester, 100 Words, Rated PG, set in Hell] by paperflowered
Memories are kind of like films, and John's failures are set on an automatic loop in Hell. The worst ones, the ones that ate at his soul during even the best days when he was alive - they're his constant companions.
No, that isn't quite right. The more he dwells on them, the worse they become, the more they warp. Sam before he left for Stanford, not just angry, but his face twisting into hate, revulsion. Dean's body in the backseat, dead instead of hurt, the face of his ghost accusing.
When the devil finally comes, John almost welcomes the company.